More expressions

Feelings

2007-03-21T19:25:00.000-07:00

Hoping
Wishing
Dying
Dreaming
Sleeping
Doubting
Screaming
Crying
Smiling
Tasting
Flying
Stealing
Kneeling
Praying
Laughing
Staring

I feel.

Thorns of Roses

2006-10-04T19:22:00.000-07:00

I pricked my finger on a thorn once.

It was froma rosebush, that had

beautiful red roses.

As I watched the blood trickle,

I noticed the velvet petals and

leaned forward to smell one.

I suppose life isn't always

full of roses.

People admire the beautiful flowers,

but forget about the lurking thornls.

But sometimes it takes that

one sharp pain to help you

notice the beauty of everything

And appreciate the life you have.

Just like the thorns of a rose.

Kou-chan

After Today

2006-08-18T21:58:00.000-07:00

The future...such a mysterious thing.
Dreaded but anticipated at the same time.

I envy the future.
Whether happiness or turmoil.

But after today,
I only want to think of now.

Memories aren't for us.
Live for today, not afterwards.

The past should be kept,
But not forgotten, lest you neglect yourself.

But what after today?
Perhaps it is better not to know...

I wait for after today.

Kou-chan

Why? (Funny quotes I found)

2006-06-01T20:01:00.000-07:00

Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery?"
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is a boxing ring square?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Why is it that to stop Windows 95 or 98, you have to click on "Start?"
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why is the word dictionary in the dictionary?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes? Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Kou-chan

Not about Love

2006-05-29T21:20:00.000-07:00

What is love
Is it real?
Does it last?

Or is just another
word for lust.
Is it only an illusion?

Only temporary,
it never lasts.
Just to pass time.

If you are happy
it's only for
a little while.

The person you
'love' will eave
one day...

Then your
heart will be
broken.

I don't know
what love is,
I never will.

But maybe
one day
I'll be happy.

Kou-chan

In Between

2006-05-28T19:43:00.000-07:00

There was once a girl who lived in the past
And who had no future.

She wandered between the two times, and
Could not find happiness.

In another life, there was once a demon,
And he found death.

The only things that seemed to temporarily
Satisfy him left a hole.

They found each other by chance, or by fate,
Finding something new.

But there are never happy endings, and even
if it was not love, it was there.

Her broken soul was too shattered to be healed,
So she withered away.

His dark and unyielding past binded him to
Distancing away from the world.

Then one day they found out the only ones that
understood was themselves.

And in each other they filled whatever was left
of their dying life.

Unfortunately good things never seem to last,
And she was thrown away.

He was captured and bounded into a separate world
To stay awake for centuries.

Eventually she found him, tied to an ancient promise,
A hearbeat was heard.

Years passed, and she aged, and he remained the same
As they grew in each other.

One day he smelled something on her that reeked
Of a short lived fantasy.

She died, and he lived for years after, wandering without
A purpose, a dream or reason.

Then he met someone that seemed to be familiar, and before
He could return home...

He smelled it, a split second warning before his concious exploded,
And he was lost again in eternity.

They found each other all over again, and wanted and longed
For a life that would not be theirs.

Always in between.

Kou-chan

A/N: I know this probably doesn't make sense, and it probably won't. It's only for me.

Enough

2006-05-23T19:37:00.000-07:00

I've heard this a million times, you know.
You don't need to tell me again.
My brain isn't that dense, I always listen.
Why do you have to treat me like such a child?

I was wondering about that quote you gave,
'In the world, but not of the world?'
Well what if I want to be both, is that a sin?
I can't help it if your lectures mean nothing.

But enought of that for now, can't you give it a rest?
Just let me find out on my own, make my own quotes.
Because in the end, they'll be the ones that mean the most.

Break.

Kou-chan

Point Zero

2006-05-22T18:13:00.000-07:00

It always has to be like this doesn't it?
You ordering, me arguing.

I thought it could work out, you know.
That we could compromise.

All I hear is restrictions and lectures.
Whatever happened to free will?

I can make my own mistakes, and learn,
just like you told me before.

But if you won't let me make them first,
How can I ever gain wisdom?

From now on I've decided, with or without,
I'll make my own decisions.

I can't go on living with your protection.
It's starting to suffocate me.

We all have to grow up some day.

Kou-chan

Random Quotes, Random People

2006-05-17T18:15:00.000-07:00

"Chaos never Changes, It only Evolves." ~Dynast 'Dyne
"Hey look, it's not like I want to kill people, they just come and, well, I can't deny their death wish, can I?" ~Dynast 'Dyne'

"Erm, not my business or anything, but isn't 'ultimate doom', you know, kinda bad?" ~Elesyne 'Less'
"Sometimes, the Deepest Darkness is all we need, to find the Purest Light within." ~Fynalthia 'Fyne'
"Erm, 'complete devestation' is such a harsh term, I prefer to call it simply 'side effect'." ~Fynalthia 'Fyne'

"There’s a place somewhere out there, where the sun won’t blind your eyes and your dreams come true, the key to it, is your will to risk it and start searching." ~Nuru/Ariel
"I hate this world beyond words to describe it, but I hate it more when we do nothing about it." ~Joe Spinelly/Abel

"I'm not whinning, I'm just pointing out the fact that no one ever listens to me." ~Joe Spinelly/Abel
"Wee, I always dreamed about going into hell... I was usually the torturer rather than the victim in those dreams though." ~Iris/Agar

"Why fight if I know I’ll Die? To ensure You die with me." ~Skylar K.
"Judging someone for what we see is easy. Accepting them for what they are, is not." ~Malum Pusillus

"Finding knowlage isn’t easy. Knowing what to do with it is even harder." ~Victoria S
"It’s amazing all we’re captable of doing, just to reach a universally accepted lie." ~Matt Parker
"Eww, don't even say it... hell don't even think it, I can hear you from here." ~Matt Parker

"Appearances are made to decive the mind and cloud our judgement." ~Tala Ivanov
"A name does not make you who you are. If you set yourself to be what others call you, then you truly are a pathetic creature indeed." ~Sesshoumaru

"I'll have you know I hate you, and it's indeed quite personal." ~Riley Taylor
"Light will always cast a Shadow, but a Shadow by itself is an abomination." ~Shoutan Himei
"Truth is prepacked in pieces, and everybody gets one... just not the one they wanted." ~Random thought in 'Sailor Nothing'

"I'm no expert at this, and I don't know what to do, and I'll probably screw it up, but ... there's a pretty good chance I'm in love with you." ~Harry Potter, from 'Quid Pro Quo
"I'm reasonably comfortable with feeling uncomfortable around you by now." ~Severus Snape, from 'Quid Pro Quo

"Forgive my hesitation, but I'm learning to trust in you." ~Sesshoumaru
"Hell somehow exists in the distance, between what happened and what never happened." ~Sesshoumaru
"I could say I need you, but then you would realize I want you." ~Sesshoumaru
"You'll learn, in time, to be cruel; because it's easier." ~Sesshoumaru

"Understanding is a three-edged sword.There is your side, there side, and the truth."Excerpt fromBabylon 5

I have a sneaking suspicion that the amount of red hearts and soppy love songs on the radio and television actually moved me to physical sickness. The same thing happened to me on St. Patrick’s day after seeing too much green… and drinking too much Guinness (which would make anyone throw up, regardless of how drunk they were)."~Rozefire, from review replies

"Emotionally scarred and traumatised people are just SO much sexier than the average!" ~Rozefire, from review replies

"I didn’t make it up at all and it’s true that all chocolate lovers are shallow and vacuous, mint-fiends are left-wing, and all strawberry girls are too cool for this world. There has never been a documented case to say otherwise" ~ Rozefire, from review replies

Kanashii no ha semete shimau koto da to…-Being sad is the same as giving up
- Eriol and Tomoyo From ‘The Snowmand and the swallow’

Sometimes

2006-05-17T07:14:00.000-07:00

Somtimes when the rain falls I dance beneath it.
Sometimes the flowers bloom where I can't see them.
Sometimes someone isn't who they seem to be.
Sometimes gaining wisdom means sacfrifice.
Sometimes to be the best you have to be the least.
Sometimes I can't remember who I am inside.
Sometimes people hide behing a mask because of fear.
Sometimes fear takes over, and leaves an empty shell.
Sometimes nothing's worth it.
Sometimes happiness costs more than you can bear.
Sometimes I want to run away from everything.
Sometimes the people respect turn away from you.
Sometimes being good isn't enough.
Sometimes there isn't an option for failure.
Sometimes the truth hurts.

Kou-chan

Forget

2006-05-14T19:49:00.000-07:00

The tears I see that fall down your cheeks
Tear at my heart as I wipe them away.

My consolation does nothing and there is
Nothing that makes your pain leave.

But I know that the reason you're suffering
Is because you think you are the one to blame.

So now, my only solution to save your life
Is to destroy mine by separating you.

The memory of me and my burden is what
Causes your soul to bleed in agony.

Now my love, let me soothe your aching heart
And make it all go away, make it disappear.

I will carry our memories alone from now on.

For to make you forget your pain is to make you forget me.

Kou-chan

Tears of Paper

2006-05-14T16:25:00.000-07:00

Silence.

The drops of rain pound against my ears
as I try to concentrate on irrelevant tasks.
Failing isn’t an option, but it has occurred
to me that all I’ve done my whole life is just that.
My pencil scratches uncertainly across the
blank sheet of a torn and worn piece of paper.
I tried to fix it but all that happened was another
crease or rip appearing across it’s white body.

And that’s all there is to it.

Meaningless things that add up to nothing in the
very end, but allude our minds to see a beautiful picture.
I suppose it was for the better anyway, letting it all go.
After all, material values only last a lifetime.
I can here the stream of water harder now, as it’s unrelenting
forces try to break through my shaking walls of brick and plaster.

The pencil drops from my fingers, the task once again forgotten.

I stared outside into the unclear eternity.

Looking downwards, without realizing it, a small, wet dot mars
the smooth area of the paper and I taste salt on my dried lips.

Silence.

Kou-chan

For You <3

2006-05-12T21:45:00.000-07:00

This is for you,
For all the times you made me smile,
For all the times you told me to cry.
For all the talks we had, and hugs we shared
This is for all the times I'll miss,
And all the moments not shared.
All the tears that will fall
Without someone to catch them.
I love you.
For all the times you yell my name,
And talk my ear off (:P)
For all the memories ahead,
And the sisterhood of us.
I love you,
This is for you.

Love Jujube

A New View

2006-05-12T21:11:00.000-07:00

In such grieving times
I wonder how the sky can shine so bright
and the flowers bloom so wide.

Fate has left me nothing more
than the remains of a once
inspiring dream.

I look to what is called heaven
and see nothing but endless
shades of grey and the blur
of my broken soul.

The wings that I once used to
fly away with are now tattered
and useless for the means of my escape.

You would think that the world
would notice the pain of its inhabitants.

But no.

If I look around me everything
is as it should be with their laughter
and their tears.

What justice is this that I must feel
such suffering when the only
troubles they have is themselves.

Perhaps this is not that way to go.

I walked around a corner and for
the first time in many times,
I saw a miracle.
Such beautiful colours

I smiled.

Kou-chan

Two of the Same

2006-05-12T21:06:00.000-07:00

I feel it;
The familiar surge of
anger well up
inside me.

There are
So many things I
Want to say to you
Right now.

Sometimes
It feels like you don't
Understand how you
Hurt me.

I don't know
Whether to cry or scream
My agony into The silence.

Frustration
Works into my core
While I fight to
Restrain myself.

Because I know that if I
Hurt you, I'm
No different.

Am I?

Kou-chan

Unrequitedly

2006-05-12T21:03:00.000-07:00

Even now,
Love is the only word
That can describe
What I feel
For the person
Who knows me best.

But words are like snakes
Twisting themselves
Around my heart.
How can I prove
How much you mean to me
When all I have is these.

I could say I'd die for you
But what good is that
When I'm still alive?
All I have is this emotion
That is without limits.

How blind I have been
To not see
That all I have
Is exactly what
I've had all along.

I love you.
Unrequitedly

Kou-chan

Broken Families

2006-05-12T21:01:00.000-07:00

Isn’t it wonderful, dear?
We have made a family
from bringing together two broken ones.
Now you can finally have
someone to talk to.
But you didn’t ask us if
what we thought of this
new arrangement.
Because to me these strangers
aren’t a family to me at all.
What if I wanted to keep
the old broken family instead
even if we were complete then
couldn’t we have healed
over time?
Sometimes I hate this
life with fake smiles and
misguided intentions.

Kou-chan

The End of the Line

2006-05-12T20:15:00.000-07:00

In every story, in every line
There is said to be an end.

Even in the stories there are
Happily ever afters or tragedies.

But I wonder what would happen,
If we told you that there wasn't.

The end I mean-
What if the line kept going?

I mean, I suppose there is
The great circle of life...

But what about my story?
Does it have an end?

Not everyone gets a
Happily ever after tale

So when do you know that
Your line has come to the end.

Perhaps it already has.

Kou-chan

My Dream Demons

2006-05-12T18:16:00.000-07:00

Last night I had a dream of crimson and amber.
I can geel the sweat on my face as I awaken.
There are hundreds, maybe even thousands of them.
The cruel eyes that always watch me in my restless slumer.
Who are you?
You seem so familiar...
My life may seem oridinary, but to me it's anything but.
Nightmares of haunting figues come closer every night,
And I can only think how long I have until they reach me.
I feel their claws slashing through me, pouring wine red from every cut.
Please help me!
I think I'm dying...
My friends stare back at me with indifference, walking away.
They think I'm crazy, and my soul is locked up in a forsaken room.
People in white suits try to talk to me and tell me it's not real.
Nobody believes me, and this hellhole continues every day.
I am trapped.
Won't you set me free?
Today I saw a boy who looked at me, and he seemed to see me.
His amber eyes gazed at me knowingly, piercing my soul.
I know him, I'm sure I do, but my memories slip from my hold.
The dreams won't go away, ignoring my silent plea.
Come back.
I know you don't I?
Night approaches again, but this time I have new found hope.
I fight the shadows, trying to escape their silent promise of death.
Then I see him: the amber eyes gaze right through the solid black.
Morning comes without me, but I can't find an exit from this impossible cliff, I can't find the rope.
My end has come.
My dream demons are here...

Kou-chan

Road Leading Nowhere

2006-05-12T16:57:00.000-07:00

Do you ever feel like you don't belong?

The world is a road leading nowhere,

With no reason to keep following.

With each day that comes

I wonder if there will ever be 'tomorrow.'

Yet every minute feels like eternity.

What is the use of striving

For something you can never have?

Life is one big mystery.

When the sun rises again,

Do you ever feel lonely?

Like every chance is torn away.

Trust is a feeling hard to understand

When there is so much betrayal.

Is this a reason to keep going?

Would you have the courage

To risk getting hurt again,

When you know how hard you'll fall.

Is getting back up even worth it?

The road never gets easier,

But just seems to stretch even further.

Have you ever felt love,

The true compassion for another soul?

Or is it more than something you could ever describe?

Whenever you feel like the answer

Is at your very fingertipos,

You find yourself at the beginning once again.

That's when you realize

That there never was an end to the road.

Only the choice on how to follow it.

Kou-chan